Friday, January 8, 2010

The Religion...

Nasreen, a girl, a new discovery of mine on facebook, just like I keep on doing all the time. It was a boring day when I was talking to my friend Arpit on facebook to kill the time. In the conversation something so happened that made me say, “abey wife khushi deti nahi....chheen leti hai.....tu apne sachche dost ko dukhi dekhna chahta hai kya....” and the conversation continued up to a few more comments. Few hours later when I logged in my facebook account again I found a comment underneath by this girl saying…

“@ praneet d'uh...!! The poor girl leaves her house, her family, her frnds just to be with some guy... She cooks, washes clothes, runs the house, calls his unknown family her own and still... woh sab kuch cheen leti hai??
Dont blame evrythn on the it a guy or a grl dono hi ek dusre ki khushi cheen lete hain :) But usually its d grl who looses out more (m not being biased..theek se analyze kiya hai) :P”

Her lines although made me feel bad as I never really mean that way but still it was true. Now being a prudent guy I was supposed to say sorry to her which I did. The conversation ended up with her “ITS OK” comment.

Few days later I found a general post from her stating the link of her blog and I clicked it to check if there is something interesting inside it. “urs is really a nice blog..meh impressed..” I commented to her after reading a few posts of it. Those few posts included a post which made me remember the previous conversation between us. Here I am copying the same post from her blog.


I was around with a friend and we started talking about her marriage. She is 24, so her mom is looking for a guy to get her married. Her dad passed away sometime back. Her mom talked to relatives from her father's side and they said...ask her if she likes someone but the guy should be a Muslim. The guy she is in love with is a Punjabi Hindu.

She said things will not work out. I asked her why so...after all its her life and she gets to decide who she wants to be with for the rest of her life. Her mom has said a 'NO' for her boyfriend. And she doesn't know what to do, she can’t just marry him...she says she doesn't have her dad and everythings on her mom. If she marries her boyfriend her mother will have to go through things because of her. I told her its her life and she should be taking her own decisions, but she still cant. She has to choose between her happiness and her mother.

She is the one who gonna live with that guy and not her relatives or mom. And of course she cant be with any Muslim guy...she has studied well, has a good job, has a complete different take on life. The way she dresses up, her friends, hanging out and everything. How can she possibly settle down with a Muslim guy...usually they don’t understand a word. Not that i am being biased or something. Its just that the guys who want to marry her...suck big time. One is a 10th class pass asshole, whose extremely rich and of course everyone wants her to marry him (MONEY...!!) the other doesn't do anything, will join his fathers business. I am a little biased though...Muslim men are kind of not good for marriage with her kind of a girl. I don't know how she will survive.

Further she told’s a girl who needs to change her religion. Its ok if a guy marries a girl of another religion. People are fine with it...because its the girl coming into their community. But if the same guys sister wants to marry a guy of some other religion, she can’t. WHY??

Does religion matter so much??

People go around killing each other in the name of religion, they rape and torture in the name of religion, loved ones are torned apart again in the name of religion. People are ready to give away their lives and everything for someone and something whose existence is still not proved. Human beings can do anything for their unseen god and religion but not for their own race.

I have decided to get a good job, be someone reputed, earn money and stay away from such people and communities. Even though I am interested in social work. Because I belong to a Muslim community (By default...actually am an atheist). And when I asked my dad he said....if you like someone let us know but he should be a Muslim.

If i ever get married it will be my own decision for everything and not the relatives or my family or someone else. Why cant people look at each other as humans rather than Muslims, Hindus, Sikhs, Christians, black, white, Brahmin, etc, etc...It doesn't seem that hard.

I really liked this post. How her friend is facing problems and how she had options, her happiness or her mother, only one to choose from, is a serious matter to be think nowadays. The religiousness is the only problem of this Kashmir to Kanyakumari wide country. But we do nothing. We think and think and think, sometimes discuss with our friends or post it on the blogs like me and Nasreen….But this is not the solution.

So what is the solution??? Well, friends this question is something which i cannot answer... no one can answer in absolute terms. And even if I try and write a solution here, you guys will read and go on... Therefore I would better stop writing here and leave on you to think your own solution and apply it... Guys I request you please bring a few minutes from your busy schedule and try to think over this matter. I you come out with a solution, apply it, whatever it is. It may make a difference...who knows!!!

Praneet Agarwal

© Praneet Agarwal


nasreen said...

Praneeeeet....wowwwww...thanx a lot for taking this up. I mean i am usually not able to influence people, i mean how many people read my bog posts...but thanx a lot. U actually motivated me right now to continue with my writing on such stuff. And its nice to see that at least somewhere, someone did read it and will take it further. Hats of to you dude :)

Praneet Agrawal said...

Your welcome Nasreen...

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